+ Find your birth month and paste it at the top
+ Strike what doesn't apply; highlight what does.
+ Post that and all twelve months under an eljay cut.



( The months... )

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( My analysis... )

I gotta new job, dudes!
And what a job!
I'll be posing for a cartoonist ^-^
Without clothes of course...
I always wanted to do that!
Since when I was in Fine-Arts Academy and had to draw human body during drawing lessons, I wanted to try...
Actually, I am really facinated by human's body beauty...
And it's so so so well payed <3
I hope the guy will need me for maaaaaaany sessions ;p
At least 100 hours ;p (to get enough to leave for Japan xD)
All I know is I'll first work 3 days next week, but I don't know yet how many hours, it depends on how fast the dude's drawin'... Hope he'll be soooooooo damn slow ;p

From friday, I'm a model, guys !! <3
(who'd ever think? xD)

Hn? Shyness? No, I don't know that illness, sorry u.u

That's all that's left of nearly a half of our house.
Not that the house is totally destructed, no. It is only inside and only on the right side (including my bedroom T___T).

I'm wicked.
Serisouly.
I got out of the house with my bag and my pets and while watching the flames consuming our beloved little house I got an incredible feeling of power, like if it was me who set the it on fire on purpose. My inner voice was like "burn, baby, BURN!!".  My destructive tendencies sometimes scare me... I'm pretty sure the firemen and neighboors were aware of the fact I was looking at our burning house with delight, with was really inappropriate, I know >.<

I don't know why, I can't explain.
I'm not happy with what happened.
You know, this room was the very first thing I payed with the money I earnt by myself, 6 years ago. From wallpaper to furnitures... The wallpaper is to change, some mebles are ruined and there is no more electricity there. Luckily, all my little things like my games, my books, my clothes, all that was far from the fire so it's safe... but even, I feel sad. I love this room, I felt safe there, I felt home. It was the very first room reflecting my personnality and now... it's nothing but a chaos covered by ashes...

By the way, let's talk about that bag I carried with me the whole day. When my Dad told me to get out of the house, I quickly grabbed fiew stuff and  pulled them in my bag, without really thinking bout what I 'm taking. Now I'm inside again, everythign calmed down... the temperature is still high and it smells like ash of course, but everything is fine again. So I took a look in this bag and, seriously, I don't understand why I took what I took xD
Just look:

First it's kinda logic: my wallet, my mobile phone (with music and pics), the headphones I bought in Japan... but why did I also take the earphones???? And the Japanese lessons book?? And more curious, why THE FUCK did I took the message one of the guys I met in Japan wrote to help a Roku???? (I didn't even know I was the one who had this sheet of paper :/)
Seriously, I'm clueless about my actions sometimes @.@

Perhaps, my Mom is on holidays in Poland for now, so she didn't knew bout what happened. I sent her a message saying "there are spacemen in da house @.@"... yes cause I wanted to make her laugh so she wouldn't worry xD And I said there were spacemen home cause the firemen were wearing like space suits to get inside our house cause it was really filled with smoke (that much that you just couldn't see anything at all >.<)... it was useless, she worried anyway xD Of course... *sigh* anyway...

So I got back into my room and cleaned as much as I can. Then I turned to my door and saw the poster I pasted on it yesterday:

Scary xD Okay, you won, Phoenix... seriously, for fiew seconds I believed the Phoenix Force was real and that IT burnt my house xD But then something in my mind said "dude, you're in no Marvel comic, 'kay?!" Yes, yes, you're right Mrs Reason >.< It looks like when there is too much emotion, I'm even more into fantasy @.@ Fortunatly, I have a bit of reason and don't let my imagination get over me... I have more difficulties with my destructive tendencies I guess... I'm crazy, I know, no need to comment to tell me that u.u

Yeah... just too much emotions.
I'm so damn tired.
And tomorrow I'll have to clean the rest of the house with my Dad... we got a loooooot of work T_T
*sigh*
Bye for now.

Rise Against, last February.
Tim McIlrath was right in front of me and he chose my favorite song to sing his eyes in mine for a whole refrain.
The most intense seconds of my life...

That asshole kicked us out.
We have to leave until sunday.
So on sunday night we will probably be homeless T.T
I'm looking hard for a solution, trying to find a new host but the only one who replied is so far... (means the travel is expensive >.<)
And we don't have money for hostels or manga kissaten and so on...

I hate my friend for all these troubles.
I won't ever go anyway with her anymore.
And I Won't ever trust her.

I thought I could rely on her but everytime it's about doing something like that I realise I can only count on myself...

First, the host never showed up.
We finally found him anyway and stayed with him for one week.
But after one week, it appeared that our guy is pervert who wnted to prostitute us >.<
We escaped and found another host.
We are currently safe and got back all our stuff but... it's not perfect yet.
We found out that our new host kicks off people without warning them @,@
This will be fun....


T-------T

Why the fuck have I came this time?
Why did I fight so hard?
Why was I safed one more time in extremis?

Appearently, for nothing but trouble.

*sigh*

I saw my japanese ex boyfriend.
Luckilly he didn't recognize me >.<
Weird feeling...
I was thinking today that I maybe should't  have let him go like that and avoid his proposition...

If I was a bit more evil, I'd be married, unfotunatly, but in Japan for good :/
Looks like I'm maybe not as bad as I think I am.
Because I know I left him to spare him.
He was nicer than Belgian guys you know. Too nice to suffer.

Whatever, past is past.
I bought a pendant with my nickname in Shibuya 109:

I'm Kyuu ^-^
In my punk band I mean, this is my nickname.
This is also why my tattoo is called 'poison no 9'.
Actually, my whole life turns around number 9.
Not really a lucky number, more something like a part of my identity.

Tomorrow we'll be going to Square Enix Shiwcase, yey!
WIll see naked Sephiroth again *.*
xD